All this news has made me numb..but yesterday night I was triggered. Triggered by one thing my father said. He said, “don’t stay out late till night, it’s a request beta, ghar time pr aa Jaya kro”.
For a person who is always spreading wide smiles around, this was the first time I saw him teary-eyed.
And those eyes. Those moist eyes made me rethink my entire ideology on how the world works.
For something that’s always around me, I had never felt it’s vicinity so close to home until now.
For the first time, the rebel in me took a backseat and I was left speechless. I couldn’t say, you are overreacting, it’s safe out there. Because deep down I knew he was right.
In this jungle full of predators, no one except the predators themselves are safe. I was left short on words for the first time to assure him.
To assure him that his daughter is not going amidst the leopards, to assure him that this concrete jungle is safer than the real one.. while I knew the real might be safer…
For the first time, I realized, how vulnerable I was. Not only me but my entire family was. I wasn’t safe from those glaring eyes, eyes that see nothing but my naked thighs.. all news stories started to flash before my eyes, and this time I was teary-eyed.. The fear was settling in me and I wasn’t sure if it was right to stay out at night.
In a world where people give random threats for making a joke, will they accept me if I actually make some move that’s bold..
I was triggered when I realized my safety is not in my hands, it depends on how people think of me in their head.
All I could say was ..” Yes, I’ll be back on time.”